Ending
Sometimes, something comes to a conclusion without even realizing it was on that path. Today, I ended things with Bachelor #2.
A week ago we got into a fight. Or was it a disagreement? A misunderstanding? Anyway, call it what you will, it caused something to change. We talked it out and things seemed okay but there was a palpable distance between us. I think we both tried to ignore it.
On Thursday I was talking to Virginia and she asked, “So is he your boyfriend now?”
“No,” I quickly responded, “I’m not ready for that.” I should have listened to what I just confessed to my best friend and realized how telling this was. If after seven weeks of dating I knew I didn’t want to take it past the level we were at, what did this mean?
He came over last night, cooking salmon for me.
It is the second time I’ve eaten fish (I also had Chilean sea bass earlier in the week) since deciding to give meat another try, and I think I will continue to incorporate fish into my diet. I’m not sure about going past this to include chicken, but for now I’m comfortable with adding fish.
After dinner we threw in a movie and relaxed. As he was getting ready to leave he said something about it being different between us. Rather than discuss it right then, as it was 11pm and I was tired, we made plans to get together Saturday morning and talk. I went to bed and lay awake for a few minutes, thinking about things.
The last seven weeks have been great and I have really enjoyed the time I spent with him. Without sounding overly cliche, he is a great guy. I just think that after last week’s disagreement it became obvious to me that I’m not ready to be exclusive and after spending this much time with a person, I feel we should at least be on that path. And I didn’t feel like I was, so rather than drag things out while I fought some internal battle with myself, trying to make myself ready for a relationship I didn’t yet want - because no one wants to throw away a good guy, even when you know you’re just not there yet - I decided to end things. It seemed the fair thing to do, for both of us.
Oh honey… sometimes it sucks to be a grown-up, doesn’t it?
T- 21 days and counting… *HUG*
My vegetarian friend just started eating chicken and fish. She had been one for probably 15 years, and I don’t think she regrets the decision.
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Sorry about the #2 man, but more importantly……How was the fish?
Love you!!!
Did he find it odd that you took a picture of the meal? That would have thrown me for a loop.
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